My New Years Resolution? Be Myself.

When I was younger I had an innate ability to not give a crap about what any body thought of me…or so I thought. As I have grown older I realized it was a defense reflex.  Reject them before they can reject you.  If I told myself that I didn’t care what others thought then it couldn’t affect me.  I am more of a people pleaser than I ever thought. Now I care too much what people think.

The problem is, I think there is a part of me that really DOESN’T give a crap what other people think and these two parts of me conflict all the time.  If my subconscious thinks that I am giving in too much it attacks back with panic attacks, anxiety, plain old grumpiness and to use the french word “ennui”.  I think the best definition of me is  “hard as nails chick with an extremely guilty conscience.”

I am hoping that in 2010 I can learn to balance who I am, accept who I am and that people in my life can also do the same.

So here’s to a new year.  2010. May it be the best year ever.

snoopy new year

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Anxiety is not pleasant. It’s very debilitating. People confuse it with depression. I found an article that is very enlightening.

FYI Here are symptoms of anxiety, I have them all:

Physical symptoms of anxiety Psychological symptoms of anxiety
Digestive upset such as nausea, vomiting, ulcers, acid reflux (GERD), bathroom “urgency” Intense fear of death, dying, illness, injury to yourself or a loved one
Heart palpitations Sense of impending doom
Hot flashes, or sweating Insomnia
Increased heart rate Irritability, rage, defensiveness
Elevated blood pressure Shyness, avoidance of social interaction
Hyperventilation, shallow breating, light-headedness Inflexibility, especially to last-minute changes
Trembling, shivering, “the jitters” Food issues including overeating, not eating enough, and emotional eating

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About Jen Rattie

I am a "crafty" mom of 3, product reviewer, book addict and a paranormal enthusiast. I am a New Englander at heart but I currently live in the MidWest. I am obsessed with the ocean, smart phones, books, anything supernatural and although I am hopelessly sarcastic..I am a softy. Oh and I like coffee. A LOT.

Check out my book blog The Crafty Cauldron

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